33 Things I Love About My Valentine

Love may be in the air, but stress has been on my mind.

The last couple of weeks have been unusually hectic for me, having finally settled into a groove at my new job (they’re still hiring) and starting the Tenacious Ladies Meetups.

Mr. Man has been equally busy with San Clemente Patch, too, with a nuclear power plant leak and, most recently, the devastating shooting of Sgt. Manny Levi Loggins by a sheriff’s deputy.

As the work hours and stress mount, my patience plummets.

Unfortunately, Mr. Man bears the brunt of my short temper. The busier we are, the more crucial it is that we keep the house organized. Alas, he does not share this philosophy.

So, as you might have already guessed, we’ve exchanged a fair amount of snaps and snarls over these last few weeks.

Angry? Write a Love Letter

Then, the other day in the midst of chaos, I remembered an exercise I did within the first few weeks of my health coaching training program. The assignment was to write a love letter to or about someone with whom we were having a rough time. “Why do you love the person you can’t stand at the moment?”

Though I was skeptical at first, upon completing the assignment, I noticed my mood and thoughts toward the person improved immediately. It works because it’s a simple exercise that forces you to look at the bigger picture. It helps you see all the positive things you love about the person that can be easy to forget when you’re angry or stressed.

Next time you’re upset with the one you love, try it.

In my case, rather than write out a full love letter, I modified it into a bulleted list including some of the many reasons why I love my Mr. Man:

33 Things I Love About My Valentine

1. His phenomenal intelligence and capacity to retain information – Who can tell you everything about the ancient Aztec civilization to how beer is made to modern politics in Russia? Adam Townsend can.
2. His skill and dedication to journalism – he’d been at it for more than a decade
3. His artistic and design abilities – have you seen his website?
4. His musical abilities – he plays the trumpet, piano, harmonica, drums, and mandolin; he has composed original piano and trumpet pieces
5. That he was in a band – ask him about “Soul Jive”
6. That he shares my love of “Archer” and “Best of Will Ferrell”
7. That he also shares my fondness for psychological crime shows, like my recent obsession with “Dexter”
8. How he supports me in whatever project I concoct – he played piano for all the V-Day 2011 “The Vagina Monologues” performances
9. His knowledge and appreciation for jazz and blues – he introduced me to Thelonious Monk and John Lee Hooker
10. His patience — especially with me and my lack thereof
11. His kindness to strangers – he always has spare change and time for people and causes
12. His eagerness to feed others – he’s a natural host, filling people’s plates and cups
13. His sociability – he can talk to anyone
14. His bonds with his friends – he’s still best friends with his childhood friends
15. How he gives others the benefit of the doubt – he’s good at remembering other people are doing the best they can, too
16. His manners – that won my family over as well
17. How he shows his affection for me often – what girl doesn’t love kisses every day?
18. How he compliments me on my “around the house” hair or clothes
19. How he acts around his family – especially his Nan (grandma)
20. How he interacts with our neighbor kids – they adore him
21. His exuberance when starting a new hobby – it’s fascinating to watch him meld into whatever he’s doing
22. His passion for learning – the man reads at least one book a week
23. His eagerness to travel – we’ve been to Greece and would love to go to Italy next
24. His willingness to try new things – whether it’s a new food or sport, he’s game (pun intended)
25. His bilingualism – he speaks fluent Spanish
26. His incredible cooking – especially omelets and any grilled meat
27. His ability to improvise while cooking – I always need a recipe
28. The way he makes perfect bacon – crispy throughout but not burnt
29. His ambition – he’s never satisfied with the status quo
30. His newfound love for boxing – watching him demonstrate the latest drills makes me smile
31. His (obnoxious) devotion to The Steelers – His adoration begrudgingly sucked me into enjoying watching football, even if it is mostly for the social factor of it, and to resurrect my Browns fan status
32. His calm and even temperament – he rarely yells
33. How he fights fair and respectfully – no name-calling

Please share: What are some of the things you love about your Valentine?